I began my yoga practice when I separated from my ex husband over 5 years ago. I had three young children and honestly didn’t truly understand the concept of “rest”. In an effort to save myself from complete insanity, my one hour of yoga became my rest. Our drishti, gaze, was to be focused on emptying the mind. I was using the poses to create a rest for my mind and my spirit. A verse God had been using to minister to my heart around this time was Isaiah 30:15 “ In Repentance and rest is your salvation. In quietness and trust is your strength. “. Its translation into Hebrew transformed my practice as our salvation, repentance, rest and quiet trust create ‘space’. My yoga instructors always said “ create space” on an inhale and length. We would make a conscious effort to press out thoughts that disturbed or distracted to create space in our minds. These efforts produced ‘Rest’.
The concept of rest to me became very deliberate and intentional. It was something I always made time for. When I found Holy yoga this rest became my meditation. Deepening my awareness and my senses to really connect. I focused my drishti now on to the spirit of my savior that dwelled inside of me and the power and peace that he brought. This truly became a place or rest for me.
This morning during my meditation I was pondering this verse. Before I could see the first light of day I hear a small bird singing outside. I thought of how carefree that little bird must be. He sings when the sun come up. He goes out to look for food when it is time. He never worries or questions that he will be cared for. Listening to this sweet bird sing I remembered Matthew 6 where God says he cares even for the needs of these birds. And if he cares for the needs of a bird how much more does he care for and meet our needs? I’d heard this verse before but it just hit me this morning so I drew my breath in deeply almost if involuntary followed by an equally deep exhale. The words of Acts 17:28 came to life for me as I breathed. ”In HIm we live and move and have our being.” He gave me my breath and I don’t have to force it or control it. I don’t have to stay awake at night making sure I remember to take my inhale and exhale. I don’t count my breaths or even think about it unless I’m doing yoga! I can’t bring my breath back once it leaves my body and I did not breathe life into my own lungs. God did. He breathed the breath of life into me and sustains me though it. He knows the number of hairs on my head, the number or tears I’ve cried and I would bet he know every breath I’ve taken. If I also live in move in him. And he dwells within my walls then why must I worry about all the things I do? He takes responsibility for meeting ALL MY NEEDS. He doesn’t need me to do his job. He promises he has a plan and a purpose for me. He asked his disciples to leave everything and follow him. I know the argument of “I must plan a future and be wise and provide.” It’s my argument as well. But I’ve come across a truth that makes this all so simple. What if I only obeyed what he asked of me? What If I did the things he commanded in his word and followed what he whispered in the quiet spaces of my inmost being?
I came back in my mind to Isaiah 30:15, rest. I am a planner. A chronic to do lister. A step follower. A plan and fall back plan person. A recovering control freak. Guess how many of my plans lasted? Yeah….. none. They’ve all had a course and then gone another way. I’m starting today, in faith, to believe, just for today, that al I truly have to do is follow Him. For me, this means not seeking a full time job because I’m in a crazy rush to (once again) get out of my parents house. I don’t think it would it would be wrong if I did. However I think there may be something better for me. I feel God whispering to me in my heart and through these verses that there is…..
So today I choose to rest and wait. I can rest, not just in the hour I will set aside to practice holy yoga, but in every fiber, every breath, all day rest. Because he says he has a plan, Jeremiah 29:11. he has perfect timing and I can trust him. He cares for me and he is sovereign. He has proven thus far for these truths to be solid in my life. I choose to root down in His truth, His words.
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